Every once in a while, maybe three or four times every five or six years, give or take, I feel exactly how I do now; absolutely nothing.
No will or desire to laugh or cry. Even wanton thoughts of the many gorgeous women in pleasantly revealing clothing at my job produce no desirable or lascivious thoughts, even the women who smile and acknowledge me, spark no interest what so ever. The same feelings go for men in case you're wondering. When your a head case loner, many people assume your gay, no, I'm just an innocuous lunatic, a sole entity.
My looks and income will never allow me to have a woman I desire, but right now, it's awesome, because I feel absolutely nothing. This void of love, lust and laughter is incredibly awesome.
If I was completely alone on an island with Wi-Fi, abundant with food, water, a sea boat and an airport to get to civilization when I needed it for the acquisition of past and present books and movies, I'd be extremely content.
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