A Modern Moron Movie Review

The diabolical intentions of six kidnappers meets the nefarious desires of Abigail, a 12-year-old vampire.  

Six high profile thieves follow the dictates of an entity who convinces them to seize Abigal and hold her hostage for millions of dollars. Each of the six is set to make $7 million apiece, so they go along with the plan. 

This was the most original vampire story I've ever seen. Nonfans of graphic horror might wanna pass on "Abigal," but I laughed out loud on occasion, and the blood and gore are not the focal point of this flick. 

All the actors were believable in an utterly bizarre blitzkrieg of nonsense, but somehow "Abigal" works, and I found myself rooting for Abigal, extremely well portrayed by Alisha Weir. I also didn't want Joey to die. Joey was the sexy and savvy black-haired dream, Melissa Barrera.  

The ending was something I didn't see coming. Three stars easy for "Abigal." 

Mark Izzy Schurr 

A Modern Moron Book Review

Using her acorn compass and the help of Lewis Lady bug, Beatrix Butterfly and Cleo Cricket, Addie Ant sets forth on an all-day adventure. 

Addie lives with her two aunts, Gertie and Zelda in the tomato bed and decides to venture to where the watermelons and sunflower seeds grow. 

"Addie Aunt Goes on an Adventure" is the first book by acclaimed singer and song writer Maren Morris and former schoolteacher Karina Argow and illustrated by Kelly Anne Dalton.  

Books and stories for young children still exist, and bravo to the trio of women who spawned Addie Ant. 

We cannot stay home all our lives; we must present ourselves to the world and we must look upon it as an adventure. (Beatrix Potter) 

Three and a half stars for the April release of "Addie Ant..." 

Mark Izzy Schurr 

Another Modern Moron Movie Review

A group of combat journalist encounter military maniacs without conscience or restraint and eager to kill anyone not born in the United States and that's just a small part of what happens in "Civil War," released on Friday.  

A college aged woman is determined to be a combat journalist and she gets what she bargained for and the horrid details of war reign in her camera's eye. I never had the desire to be a combat photographer and "Civil War" affirms these feelings. 

Three stars easy for "Civil War." 

Mark Izzy Schurr.   

  

 

A Modern Moron Movie Review

In order for the Catholic Church to survive, it's hierarchy resurrected the devil's son as an infant in 1971 in this month's "The First Omen."  

The latest installment of "The Omen" follows the book on the details of the pre and actual birth of Beelzebub's son. The unscrupulous and extremely macabre orphanage got their baby evil into the world of high-profile politics as an infant in the early 1970s in hopes he becomes the President of the United States. 

It's absolutely horrid what happens to many young nuns in this Roman church, but "The First Omen" writers, crew and actors left the absolutely horrifying details to the mind. Released on the 5th, "The First Omen" is the 6th installment of "The Omen" films, first released in 1976. The American nun, and star of the film displays true resistance and unites with another nun in a cunning ploy to escape the nefarious Roman church. 

This version is a prequal to the original movie and it's clearly set up for a sequel I'd definitely go see. I was disappointed the entire film revolved around Satan's birth, but the ending has an unsuspecting curve and a valid foe against Damien, the son of the Devil. Does the Devil have a sister?

Just under three stars for "The First Omen,"  

Mark Izzy Schurr 

  

"Imaginary," A Modern Moron movie review

Chauncy Bear lures his prey into a radically dark dimension by mixing their imaginations into his reality. 

"Imaginary" caused me to jump once. The sporadic moments of Hollywood fluff didn't bother me in this film. I thought the story was originally clever. Chauncey Bear is very meticulous in choosing who he slays or manipulates. 

Chauncey Bear kidnaps a very young girl and takes her to his realm of dark insanity. The little girl's mother and her 15-year-old sister must learn how to enter an unknown realm for an attempted rescue of their innocent sibling. Now that's a dilemma. 

"Imaginary" targets the suspense and terrors of the mind, rather than excessive amounts of special effects. Three stars easy for "Imaginary." 

Mark Izzy Schurr  

The Ecstasy and the Agony of Human Nature Showcased in "Love Lies Bleeding."

 

"Love Lies Bleeding" is a bizarre blitzkrieg of cinematic fantasy, ignoring all the stereo types of what sexy is, or perhaps ought to be. 

Jakie is an intoxicating creation of sexuality in Lou's heart. Kristian Stewart as Lou has the demons of her father being high up in organized crime, and she also yearns to kill her sister's husband, because he's an excessively abusive lame brain.  

Katy M. O'brian is the body building babe trying to convince Lou to run off to Las Vegas with her while she enters a prestigious body building contest. "Love Lies Bleeding" exposes the dark side of lascivious behavior, yet emphasis the exquisite power of tangible love. 

"Love Lies Bleeding" is far more than a sex charged woman meets woman romance, it's a crime story with sly intensity. Three stars easy for this flick, released on the 8th. 

Mark Izzy Schurr

"The Last Election," Another Modern Moron Book Review

"This is absolutely the stupidest f****** system in the world, we want to change it," Alex McLuhan said. 

I honestly forget who Alex McLuhan is, but it's his direct quote from Andrew Yang's latest book, "The Last Election." I becha McLuhan is a member of the Maverick Party. Simple fact, the Maverick Party is a spawn of Yang's Foward Party. Not left, not right, but Foward. 

The Foward Party has some great policies; open primaries, UBI, no more Electoral College, the candidate who receives the most votes, wins, simple. Only gun owners should be able to fire their guns, and with today's technology, it could be made possible.   

Universal Basic Income for all American citizens 18-years-old and older. Yang got this idea from Martin Luther King Jr who spoke about a guaranteed supplemental income in 1967. Yang's book "The War on Normal People" details where the money would come from and the MATH works.

Make America Think Harder was coined by a Yang Ganger during his 2020 presidential campaign. Companies such as Amazon and General Mills would pay one percent of their profits into UBI and every google search would cost .01 cent. These are just two of the many other sources UBI would generate from.    

Imagine an additional $700 a month after taxes on top of whatever else you earn, and no matter how much one nets, they still get the money, as long as they meet the two above criteria's, thus eliminating the argument, you get it, and I don't. Yang laughs when it's said people won't work if they receive Universal Basic Income. Can you live on $12,000 a year in the U.S.? Yang said. 

Yang's a better choice than our current two candidates, but I regress, he's not running this year. Yang talks about the gerontocracy between President Biden, Donald Trump and America in general in this book, "The Last Election."  

Yang talks too much about the Maverick Party, or does he? One thing is clear, Yang is 100 percent correct when he says Americans need better choices in our presidential candidates, regardless if their democrat or republican. He pushes for one day having a third party that competes evenly with our current two choices.  

 

"You don't need inside knowledge to see the country is falling apart," Yang said. 

Three stars easy for October's "The Last Election," co-written with Stephen Marche.

Myself with Andrew Yang at his meet and greet in San Francisco in June.

  

Mark Izzy Schurr